When I am weak

Here I am trying to express to you what has been going on with us and I can't even get it out. All I keep hearing is my 7 year old dear son humming the Hot wheels theme. And my mind is blank. Have you been there??? Okay, here let's try this again. This last month has been like a roller coaster ride. Every since I decided my goal for this year was to go deeper into GOD and allow Him to fight my battles. The war has been on and satan has been on the prowl as usual. I have to be honest with you, sometimes I just want to give up and throw in the towel. And then I remember the race I am in and the price that has been paid and of course my love and devotion to my LORD and family. My hearts biggest desire is to have a meek and quiet spirit so my children will see JESUS in me. It's seems the harder I try the harder it gets...Am I the only one this happens to? My quiet time with the Lord in the morning is so good and then the day starts...I know the good I want to do, but don't do it. It's seems I do more apologizing to my children than I do disciplining. GOD please help me take captive the thoughts in my mind and keep me close to Your side today. I love you. Amen